I Love You Tonight

Post-it note under my son's pillow before he went to bed

Today I stuck a post-it note under my son’s pillow before he went to bed. Kids look so peaceful when they’re asleep. We say ‘sweet dreams’ and ‘I love you’ to each other every night. I love him when he’s sleeping.

 

Footnote: This was my very first post back on January 1st this year. I don’t know whether to be proud or embarrassed by this post. In reflection, I can’t believe I had so little to say. Like learning to run I guess I had to walk first. A distinct memory is etched in my brain of the very first person to like this post and of how excited I was. That blogger, who has not been seen since, will always hold a special place in my heart. I hope you don’t mind bearing with me as I revert to baby steps while revisiting old posts while my attention is focussed elsewhere.

 

 

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Top 10 Tips for Showing Love

love is a verbShow me the love!

The words ‘I love you’ are easy for most parents to say to their child. It is a little more difficult with the fast pace of day-to-day life to find time to show kids the kind of love they will most remember you for.

When I think back to my own childhood the fondest memories I have are of the things we did not words that were said. I knew my parents loved me because of their actions not from a single spoken, ‘I love you’ even though it’s lovely to hear and I heard it often.

So here’s the Top 10 Tips that can help create memories of love that will last a lifetime:

          1. Show and tell. In our home we have an unwritten policy that means we try and express our love in as many ways as possible. Children can learn how to sign ‘I love you’ from quite a young age. Another way is just to point to your eye, your own heart and then point to the person you’re aiming your love at. Both of my boys love having their back tickled before being tucked in at night. So after sharing a story, I will tickle their back and write, ‘I love you’ with my finger.
          2. ‘I love you because…..’ Simply stating ‘I love you’ can be wonderful to hear. It has even more meaning when there is a connecting reason given to the receiver. The end of the sentence could convey how you feel, ‘I love you because I feel so lucky to have you as my son/daughter.’ You may choose to say something about the child’s appearance, ‘I love you because when you smile it lights up your whole face.’ Receiving compliments can be difficult for adults who have never learned to graciously accept them as children. This one is then two-fold-a compliment and an expression of how you feel all rolled into one.
          3. Little things impress little people. Sticky-notes in lunchboxes, sandwiches cut into shapes or heading to the playground straight after school are all little things that are a big deal to kids. Think of something you know your child will appreciate and it doesn’t have to cost a cent to be meaningful.
          4. Spend time wisely. Everyone knows childhood is gone in an instant. Blink once and they’re walking. Blink twice and they’re at school. Blink again and they’re getting their license. I know I want my children to enter adulthood with the recollection that I had time for them. That I wanted to spend time with them, share it with them and try as I might, make it stand still. Capture moments, get lost in the moment but don’t miss the moments of time you could have spent with them.
          5. Do things as a family. Family time is hard to find for some but so important. There are times when we need to divide and conquer to achieve tasks but ensuring your family has together time is essential. It might be as simple as an adventure in the backyard or as complex as going on a day trip with a picnic lunch.
          6. Lend a hand and let them help. Helping children shows your willingness to engage in what’s important to them. Like any relationship it needs to be reciprocal. Allowing them to help you with tasks or involving them in your interests shows them that you care what they think and feel and that yo appreciate their willingness.
          7. Model love. Children learn their cues from adults. Demonstrated love will allow them to see how it’s done and put it into practise.
          8. Actions speak louder than words. Cuddles, kisses and hugs and lots of them. As human beings we crave touch-the feel of a warm embrace, a kiss from a loved one or to cuddle up together without a care in the world. Not a day should go by when your children don’t feel the warmth of your heart beating next to theirs.
          9. Greet and farewell them like a long lost friend. Having children understand that you miss them when they’re gone but be so happy to see them again later helps them to understand that they are important people in your life. Sharing the day’s events when together again is a great way to connect with kids.
          10. Remind them constantly. A day without love is like a day without sunshine.

Most certainly, there are many other ways to express love through actions. If you have a way of showing love you’d love to share I welcome contributions.

Kelly ♥

© 2013 Kelly Hibbert, all rights reserved.

Image from: here.

I Love You Because……

all the reasons I love you………(pregnant pause).

‘Yes, you love me because………….’

‘you don’t fart in bed like Dad does.’

I asked my boys tonight why they love me. I was prepared for the, ‘because you’re my mum,’ response. I was not prepared for the answer I got instead.

After clutching at my sides for quite some time and then regaining my composure we got back to the question that was still hanging in the air (luckily nothing else was in the air).

Responses from Me First were:

‘We do cool stuff together like go to the playground and skate park.’

‘You make yummy bikkies.’

‘When I hurt myself you kiss me and make it all better.’

‘I love your cuddles. They make me feel safe and happy.’

Answers from Me Too were a little less defined but included:

‘You make yummy lunch.’

‘You play trucks with me.’

‘You love me.’

So what is one to glean from all of this? From a 5 and 2 y.old’s perspectives it seems that I am meeting their needs. We break bread together, not just biscuits. We play, laugh and learn together. They see love and they feel love. Is there anything else children of this age need? Perhaps I’m oversimplifying life but of bigger concern than that would be overcomplicating.

I love my kids. They’re unique and spirited children. They’ve got scars and bumps and are rarely scar-free. Their enthusiasm is contagious even if their energy is not. They put life in my years and grey hairs on my head. They amaze me, irritate me and leave me speechless. They give the best leg hugs and smooches in the business.

There’s nothing else I need from them. Do they need anything else from me?

What do your kids love about you? Perhaps ask them and see what they say. Witty, soppy and left-of-field are all valued here.

I love you just because.

Image from: here.